Luke 9: 57-62

We must set our eyes on the kingdom.  Today I did something that was extremely hard to do.  I should have done it before, but just did not seem like it was something I was ready to do.  Father in his loving caring way showed me that by holding on I was actually hindering what he is doing in my life.  What is this thing? You may ask.  It was holding on to my late wife.  She will always be the love of my life, but not letting her go hindered the ministry that Father is creating now.  It is hindering building other personal relationships. The scripture above is rather harsh in what Christ is getting across here.  But it hit me like a ton of bricks.  I came to realize by this scripture that Sharon is with Father.  I need to remember the good things we did as memories, not as live events that are still going on.  I need to be seeing her in our kids and grandkids.  But realize they are showing her great qualities and not her.  Today I went to the grave site, and wrote her an intimate letter.  I expressed my feelings about events that happened between us.  I ask her forgiveness for those things that needed forgiving from her as I realized they have been forgiven long ago.  Then I did something I thought I would not be able to accomplish I said good bye for awhile.  You may ask, Mike why would you share this most intimate part of your life with us.  The answer to that question is really quite simple.  The point of the above scripture is this; we are given a job to do.  As long as we are holding onto the past, whether good or bad it will hinder us from performing those things we need to perform.  When things happen that change us we must use those things to build our character in a way that continues to build Fathers kingdom.   Things that happen are building blocks.  They are not the building.  It does no good to take a block and set it, pull it up, and reset it over and over again.  I will always love the gift that Father gave me for a season.  I will cherish her memory, but I must walk forward in what Father is leading me to for the building of his kingdom, realizing that I will see her again, and looking forward to that day.  But until that day comes I must say good bye and walk out what he has for me to do here.

Go in peace